


a second or a while

by constant



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, basically seunjin being cute bffs, blond seungmin, for skz secret santa!, mullet hyunjin, the rest of skz are just mentioned, this is p corny pls forgive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:54:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21901834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/constant/pseuds/constant
Summary: His dad has always been telling him off with his impatience, telling him that life, in whatever aspect, would sometimes require a bit more time, and that being patient can almost always end up being truly rewarding. Like how that saying goes,good things come to those who wait.Or just six important moments of Hyunjin waiting for Seungmin.
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin & Kim Seungmin, Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin
Comments: 17
Kudos: 146
Collections: SKZ Secret Santa





	a second or a while

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Anemone_lj](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anemone_lj/gifts).



> •to my recipient, hi!! i tried to create a theme for this work & idk if it's ok for u but i hope you enjoy!!  
> •thanks to r for sending me all the motivation i needed in writing this hehe <3  
> •also,, apologizing ahead for grammatical errors & run-on sentences. thank you for reading and happy holidays!

**I.**

Hyunjin can feel the wind tousling his hair as he darts through the unwinding path of the esplanade. He ignores the intrigued glances strollers throw at his direction when he zooms past them. He kinda gets it. I mean, it’s not every day you see a young man dressed in skinny jeans, a plain black shirt, and shoes (which are definitely not made for running), running along the boardwalk of one of the most famous tourist spots in the country. 

Hyunjin starts to feel his chest burning from the long trek, drops of sweat trailing down on either side of his face and he quickly wipes them away with the back of his hand. For a moment, he considers pausing for a break, but he catches sight of the bridge - the end of the line - and sees a figure standing idly under it, and that pushes him to move faster. 

No one asked him to run, and there is absolutely no need for him to get to his destination as fast as possible either. The person waiting for him at the bottom of the bridge isn’t going to disappear when he gets there a less earlier than expected.

But you can’t really blame him. 

Anyone who plays a major role in Hyunjin’s life would know that the boy is being fuelled by a 24 hr burning passion of all sorts of emotions, and acts on it before he even realizes what he’s doing. Jisung told him that it’s one of his best qualities, saying he has never seen anyone more driven in all the things that they do. Felix told him that he’s one of the most expressive people he has ever met, saying that the world could do with a few more sincere people like him. While he’s grateful for their positive insights, Hyunjin thinks that the same aspect of his personality could also be the thing that could break him. His intense emotions sometimes causes him to act on impulse, leaving him in regrets and an overwhelming amount of unbidden thoughts. 

This time, however, Hyunjin is certain that the impulsive act of scrambling out of bed without bothering to change in a more decent clothing and heading straight out the door will only lead to something that he can’t even bring himself to regret. 

Just thinking about it - _just thinking about seeing him again_ \- makes his heart loop and twist into a tight knot in his chest. 

Hyunjin gulps as he nears the bridge, the dull silhouette of the man steadily morphing into a clearer vision as he closes the distance between them. The dim outline bursts into vibrant colors and familiar features, and that was all it took for Hyunjin to finally stop dead in his tracks. His heart gives up at the sight, and he crouches on his knees, heaving under the heat of the summer sun. 

He hears him laugh, the feather-light sound bouncing against the bottom of the bridge and the pillars supporting it. 

_Wow._ If Hyunjin isn’t trying to catch his breath, he would have sprinted by his side at that moment. 

“You didn’t have to run, idiot!” 

It's Hyunjin's turn to laugh this time, and he finally gathers what is left of his strength to close the remaining distance between them. 

It was only, what? Ten, fifteen yards away? And yet Hyunjin thinks that it was the longest journey he has ever taken. 

Seungmin is beaming at him as he approaches, bouncing a little on his feet. Hyunjin would like to humor himself that Seungmin’s also excited to see him today. 

“You’re all sweaty.” Seungmin's eyes trail along his sweat-streaked face, making Hyunjin feel very conscious. Hyunjin hastily dabs at his face to rid of the dampness that his friend just pointed out and as well as to hide the warm blush that has crept on his cheeks. He could only hope that he doesn’t look as messy as he imagines he would be.

“Couldn’t really help it.” He responds, still a little breathless.

“I didn't ask you to run.” 

Hyunjin smiles and finally brings his hand down to look at the other boy. “Couldn’t help that either.” 

The wind gushes and sweeps Seungmin’s hair, and that’s when Hyunjin only notices. 

“Woah, you dyed your hair!" Hyunjin reaches out to ruffle his bronze locks, but Seungmin is quick to move away from his grasp. 

"Does it look okay?" 

_"_ More than okay." Hyunjin says immediately. "It makes your eyes pop. You look…" 

Hyunjin can't find the right word. 

"Look what?" Seungmin asks impatiently. 

Hyunjin holds up a finger to keep Seungmin on his spot. He even takes a step back to take a better look at the other. Seungmin's wearing his favorite Rick and Morty hoodie that Hyunjin has seen him in for a number of times now. The jeans he has on is the one Hyunjin has gifted him on his birthday, paired with his overworn white chuck sneakers. Other than his dyed hair, nothing's really new. But why does Seungmin give off a different vibe around him?

"Look _what_?" Seungmin says again. 

"Different." Hyunjin prompts, and decides he can think more about the matter later. "Different, but _good_ different." 

And then something happens: Seungmin _smirks._

Not his signature meek smile, nor that adorable beam Hyunjin has seen when he was just approaching. It's not even that ominous little grin whenever Seungmin is planning on something evil which Hyunjin has learned to fear over the years (because the evil plan is almost always applied to him). 

_Captivating_.

That was the word Hyunjin was looking for. 

Seungmin looks captivating.

“And you look like you’ve been missing your salon appointments.” 

Wait, did he say that out loud? 

Before Hyunjin can even ask, Seungmin has reached out to touch the hair at his nape, his hand brushing subtly against Hyunjin’s neck. 

Hyunjin's buffering mind is unable to catch up with the series of sparks and touches caused by Seungmin's sudden gestures. (Either Seungmin's moving incredibly fast or Hyunjin's just overthinking every little thing). 

“I can’t believe you grew a mullet.” Seungmin shakes his head disapprovingly, a teasing grin on his face. 

“I can’t believe you went to a summer camp at your age.” 

“I told you, mom made me do it!” 

They spend the next ten minutes arguing and making fun of each other’s hair (mostly just Seungmin though, because Hyunjin can't seem to find anything to say about Seungmin's dyed locks except that he looks beautiful with it), until Seungmin blurts out about being famished and they decide to head over to that burger place they frequent. 

“How was it really?” Hyunjin asks as he grabs for Seungmin's cup of soda over the table. He emptied his own minutes ago before he could even finish his meal. Seungmin always tells him off for this, but still lets him drink on his cup without further argument. 

Seungmin looks up from his chicken nuggets to shoot him a questioning look, and so he adds, “Camp.” 

Seungmin’s face lights up almost immediately, and Hyunjin couldn’t help but giggle at his reaction. He looked like a kid being told on a Christmas morning that Santa has left presents for him under the tree. It was very cute. 

“Did you meet a lot of _playmates_?” Hyunjin teases. 

He will never live down the fact that Seungmin’s mom made him attend a summer camp that is supposedly exclusive to kids aged 7-12. Seungmin explained that an aunt living across the country lost track of time and forgot that Seungmin’s already nineteen, not twelve, and signed him up for the camp and paid all the expenses as a late surprise birthday gift. Seungmin wasn’t even the least bit pissed when he found out he was going to some kiddie camp for eight weeks.

 _Eight weeks_! Imagine being stripped away eight weeks of your life without your consent whatsoever. If Hyunjin were in his shoes, he would have thrown a fuss and argued his way out of going. (Guess that’s just shows who deserves to be sent at a kiddie camp more.)

 _Eight weeks!!_ That’s how long the camp lasted. That’s how long Seungmin was away. That's two lonely _first fridays_ for Hyunjin. That’s how long Hyunjin spent holed up in his room, staring up at the gum he stuck on the ceiling as a kid, trying to think of a fun thing to do before he has to get back to uni. Felix went back home to Australia, and Jisung isn't exactly on the top list of people Hyunjin wants to hang with on a boring summer day. Though they _did_ try - Hyunjin and Jisung - and it took more time for them to figure out what to do than actually doing the thing they decided on. They ended up spending their remaining time eating snacks at the nearest convenience store, talking about everything and nothing. 

At some point within those eight weeks, Hyunjin has offered to assist his mom at her clinic (she’s a dentist). That’s how bored he was. Rather, that’s how desperate he was to find something that would keep himself occupied. He learns later that it doesn’t necessarily have to be fun, just as long as it could help him keep Seungmin off his mind. 

One thing that irks him about this camp is that campers aren't allowed to use their phones in the duration of their stay. Meaning, that was eight whole weeks without any form of communication with his best friend. 

Hyunjin thought eight weeks isn't that too long of a time to be apart from each other, but as the weeks dragged on and he finds less and less things to entertain himself with (as much as he tried to stop himself from doing it because it's just _major cringe)_ , Hyunjin still ended up counting down the days until Seungmin comes back home. 

He missed him. God, he really did. 

“The kids were more well-behaved than I expected.” 

Seungmin tells him about a kid named Raon, an eight year old who liked to draw elephants and can stuff a maximum of four marshmallows into his mouth. He also tells him about Haru, a cute little girl who liked to pick flowers for the other kids and never missed a day without wishing Seungmin a good day. 

The excitement Seungmin radiates as he proceeds telling about the memories he made at the camp is contagious. Hyunjin can tell from his even-toned voice that he's trying to contain his excitement, but his _eyes_. His eyes are giving him away. 

"Oh, and if you thought I was the only teenager at the camp, you're wrong." Seungmin pauses to wipe something on Hyunjin's cheek with a tissue. Hyunjin holds his breath when the other's hand moves near his mouth, smiling a little when Seungmin catches his eye.

Seungmin starts speaking again after drawing his hand back, cutting off the short lived moment of Hyunjin's daze.

"There was this guy who accompanied his nephew. He's only a year older than us." 

"At the camp?" Hyunjin asks dumbly. The sudden contact sent his mind to short circuit again.

"Yes, Jinnie. At the camp. Keep up, please." 

Seungmin tells him about Changbin. How the guy was responsible for their jamming sessions during campfires by taking out his guitar and leading the group into a song. How he and Seungmin sang together for the children. How they both automatically became the camp leaders because they were the oldest, creating a friendly rivalry between the two groups that was formed before the start of camp. In the end, Seungmin's team won only by a few points and he claims it's because Changbin, during a final game of archery, missed the bullseye on purpose. 

"He sounds nice." Hyunjin says matter of factly as he grabs for Seungmin's soda again. 

"He is! He lives in Yongin, though. I was hoping you could meet him sooner." 

Hyunjin hums as he pretends to sip from the cup, which he knows he emptied a while ago. 

**II.**

"Can’t you just choose something and go?" Hyunjin asks as he pulls out a navy blue suit jacket from a rack. He holds the garment up his chin and briefly checks his reflection in the mirror located against the far wall.

" _Hyunjin._ " Seungmin sighs exasperatedly, his tone making Hyunjin flinch and turn his full attention to him. 

"Don’t get me wrong. I'm not complaining about being woken up on a weekend morning by the sound of rocks thrown at my window." Hyunjin says nonchalantly, and Seungmin rolls his eyes. "I’m just - you know, suggesting a very inconspicuous way to get back in losing a bet. **"**

“That’s not how bets work, Jinnie. And besides, I actually kinda want to do this.” Seungmin scoops a handful of clothing into his arms, balancing them carefully before looking straight into his friend’s eyes. “Like seriously. I want to choose the best because I want Jeongin to look good.” Without another word, he proceeds to the fitting room, leaving Hyunjin dumbfounded. 

"Oh, okay! All right! I'll be right here if you need me!" Hyunjin yells after him, and the door to the fitting room shuts.

It was just a little over 10 am earlier when Hyunjin hears a series of thumping on his window, waking him up in his most precious slumber. Groaning, he lifts himself out of bed and drags his feet towards the commotion. A gush of cold air welcomes him as he opens the window, shivering slightly before looking over the street to see a man wrapped in a bundle of clothing. A scarlet scarf is pulled up to the man’s nose, and Hyunjin has to rub the sleep off his eyes just to make sure that he is indeed seeing who he thinks he’s seeing. 

“Finally. You took ages!” 

Hyunjin spots the little pile of rocks by Seungmin’s feet, and he shakes his head in disbelief. How many of those was he planning to throw at his window? Until the whole thing breaks? He considers berating Seungmin for settling with a waking-up-method that could have broken his property, but Hyunjin, because he has just enough sappy bones in his body, couldn’t help but look at it in a romantic way. “Good morning to you too, Romeo.”

Seungmin ignores him. “Get dressed.” 

Hyunjin rests his elbows on the window sill and cups his face in his hands, trying not to shiver as another gush of wind blows. “No.” 

“ _Hyunjin_!” 

He hears the impatience in the other’s voice, and Hyunjin couldn’t hold back a smile even if he tried. “You couldn’t have thought to call? What if you broke my window?” 

“As if you care about your window! I’m coming up, okay?”

“You couldn’t have thought of that either?!” Hyunjin yells, leaning over the window as Seungmin disappears into his home. When he asks later of their agenda, Seungmin replies matter of factly, “I’m choosing a prom tux for Jeongin, and you’re helping me.” 

“Don’t they have tuxedos in Busan?” Hyunjin asks in the bus on the way to the store.

“Of course they do, but we have better and _more_ choices here.” 

Hyunjin frowns. “I’m pretty sure that’s not true-”

Seungmin cuts him off, “And also because I lost a bet.” 

That was all it took for Hyunjin to understand. He eventually learns that Seungmin lost the bet on purpose because he wanted to be the one to choose Jeongin’s outfit, knowing full well about his cousin’s taste in fashion, and that Jeongin wanted to impress his prom date despite not admitting to his little crush on her.

Hyunjin paces impatiently by the fitting room door, his phone set and ready to take Seungmin’s picture the moment he reveals himself with his chosen outfit.

Suddenly, _finally_ , Seungmin’s chuckles resonates from the closed room, and he yells out, “I look stupid!” 

“I’m sure you look fine. Let me see!” 

The door slowly opens, revealing Seungmin in a classy, burgundy-vested suit that fit him _so_ well, Hyunjin actually forgot that he’s supposed to take a photo of him. 

“Oh.” 

“Well?” Seungmin raises an eyebrow, turning around cooly to show Hyunjin the full view.

“The color complements your hair, but the tie. I'm not really digging the floral pattern." 

Seungmin glances down at the tie with a frown. "I thought it was the killing point though." 

"Yeah. Like literally." 

Seungmin shoots him a glare and reaches for the door to change into the next outfit. Before Hyunjin can even stop him, it's already too late.

"Hey, wait! Let me get your photo." 

"No!" And the door slams in his face. 

Hyunjin doesn't know what to expect for the next attire. After all, Jeongin did give Seungmin the liberty to choose any style and color he wants, theme be damned. Seungmin claims this is just because the kid has absolutely no idea what he wants, or what kind of outfit would be good, exaggerating on his cousin’s fashion terrorism again. 

(“Get off his back, Minnie. I’m sure he’s not that bad.” 

“Hyunjin, he wore christmas tree colors for their holiday party last year.”

“Holy shit.”)

Hyunjin really isn't expecting anything, except maybe that there wouldn't be any floral patterns anymore. When the door swings open, Hyunjin sets his phone ready, looking at Seungmin through the camera. 

Seungmin steps out and- _holy fuck._

Hyunjin has to look up from his phone to stare at him properly through his own eyes. Clad in a linen white suit and pants, Seungmin steps into full view, his face adorning with a look of unease. He brings a hand up to press on his chest area, and that’s when Hyunjin only notices. His dress shirt is open down to the first two buttons, revealing a fair amount of skin. Seungmin just outdid himself with this one, he really did. 

“Well?” Seungmin asks. 

Hyunjin opens his mouth to say that he’s _heaven sent_ , that he looks like a literal angel, but something at the back of his mind tells him that that wouldn’t be such a great idea, so he closes it back shut. 

He hears giggling from behind, and he whirls around to see one of the store clerks muffling her laughter.

When she realizes that she's being watched, she straightens her back and strides towards their direction in such confidence that almost makes Hyunjin back away. 

"You look phenomenal, sir. As a matter of fact, that particular suit is our bestseller for grooms." 

"Oh! For grooms, you say?" Seungmin's eyes light up, and he turns to look at his reflection in the mirror. "I think I'd make a good groom." He mutters to himself, but still loud enough for Hyujin to hear. 

He snorts. 

_Good? Good would be an understatement._

Hyunjin catches the lady's eye, her face adorned with amusement and something else he couldn't recognize. 

"May I help you?" Hyunjin asks rather lazily. 

"May _I_ help _you?_ " She shoots back with what Hyunjin supposes to be an accommodating smile. 

Before he could even reply, Seungmin calls for his attention.

"So, is it okay? Do you like it?" 

For some reason, Hyunjin's chest flutters at the question. He knows Seungmin meant to ask if he likes the suit _and_ the suit ONLY, but his mind couldn't help but translate it into something else, because _yes._ Hyunjin likes the suit. He likes the way it fits Seungmin, likes the way the colors give off a natural minimalist vibe, likes the way the light from the window casts directly at him, making him look like he's _glowing._ Hyunjin racks his brain for a way of saying that Seungmin looks absolutely transcendent without sounding like a complete weirdo. 

"I think he likes it, sir." The lady says with a tint of amusement in her tone, and Hyunjin turns to her, fuming slightly at the interjection.

" _You don't speak for me_." 

"So you don't like it?" Seungmin asks.

Hyunjin whirls to look at him again, who stood there uneasily waiting for his answer.

"No, I _do_ like it. It’s pretty. Definitely better than the previous one, but-" He waves a hand over the entire outfit. He doesn’t know what he’s doing. This has got to be the best look he has ever seen on Seungmin, but for some reason, he’s conjuring up a way to contradict it. But there’s only one thing that comes to his mind. And finally, he settles with, "It's for grooms." 

"Oh, right." Seungmin's face falls for a fraction of a second, his reaction indicating that he has taken a deep liking to the attire, and for a moment, Hyunjin considers taking back what he said. 

He feels a nudge on his arm, and he turns to look at the same sales lady, who motions at his phone on his hand.

"Quick, take his photo." She whispers. 

"Oh, right. Shit." Hyunjin scrambles to open his phone, panicking a little when Seungmin has already turned towards the fitting room to change. “Minnie, wait!”

Hyunjin does a series of clicks on the shutter button as Seungmin turns his head around, doe eyes flashing at him in wonder. Upon seeing the device directed at him, Seungmin breaks into the most blinding smile Hyunjin has grown accustomed to over the years. Or maybe not. Maybe Hyunjin is _still_ not used to it. 

Seungmin strikes a few poses for the camera, and Hyunjin finds it so hard to keep up, especially with Seungmin going from one pose to another in the pace of a racing heartbeat, one which oddly feels like his own. 

“I don’t think taking pictures is allowed, Jinnie.” Seungmin says after a moment, patting down the tux gently as he looks over at the general area of the sales clerk standing beside Hyunjin.

"There are exceptions." She smiles sweetly at Seungmin, who returns the gesture awkwardly. 

"I'll change now." Seungmin announces before heading back in the fitting room. 

When he disappears out of sight, Hyunjin turns to the sales lady (hopefully for the last time), reads her name off the name tag clipped on her blouse, and looks her in the eye. 

"Ms. Yeji." Hyunjin says, and the girls nods firmly, as though confirming her identity. "I don't know what your deal is, but… thank you." 

Yeji seems to be taken aback by the sudden gratitude, but her face softens immediately into a small smile. "For the photo?" 

"Yeah, for the photo. I would've never forgiven myself if I let Seungmin in that kind of outfit without documenting it for eternity." 

Yeji recoils a bit, glancing around as though she's expecting someone to jump at them at any moment, and when there wasn't, she leans in and says with a hushed voice, "Why are you whispering, sir?" 

"What?" 

Hyunjin didn't even have the time to turn her question over his mind.

"Ohhhhhhh…" She coos in realization, Hyunjin never feeling more dumbfounded in his whole life.

"What? What is it?" 

Yeji cups her hands around her mouth. "You mean, you're _not_ together?" 

"What are you talking about?" But Hyunjin starts to understand the moment the question leaves his mouth. They get that misconception quite a lot. Even their college friends, when they met for the first time, reacted dramatically when they found out that Hyunjin and Seungmin 'aren't together'. 

Like hell. Seungmin's his best friend, he's just acting according to what he thinks a best friend should behave.

“You know what, nevermind. Not my business.” Yeji waves a hand off, the look of guilt evident on her face. She switches topic faster than the fickleness of gas prices. “If you’ve decided on a tux, you can head straight to cashier 3. I’ll give you a discount.” 

“Uh, okay.” 

With a final wave of goodbye, she crosses the room and disappears out a staff-only door, and Hyunjin’s left to be reminded of how girls can be utterly wacko sometimes. 

Seungmin takes a while to come out for this one outfit. Hyunjin is just about to check on him when the door to the fitting room swings open, and Seungmin finally steps out, looking absolutely striking in an all-black tuxedo, a complete contrast to the previous outfit. Hyunjin nods approvingly as Seungmin turns slowly, the bow tie held loosely around his hand. 

“I don’t know how to tie it.” He explains bashfully when he notices Hyunjin eyeing it. 

The older bursts into laughter when realization hits him. “Is that why you took so long?” 

“Shut up.” 

Hyunjin shouldn’t be the one to laugh because he couldn’t tie a bow tie either. 

“We can just take a pre-tied one.” He suggests, and with this, Seungmin’s eyes light up. 

“That would be a great idea.” 

After another mini-photoshoot and a deliberation in which Jeongin’s (possible) opinion was taken into consideration, they decide to take the all-black tux. 

**III.**

Hyunjin finds him in the library one friday afternoon, his bronze locks standing out in a sea of raven hair. By sea of raven hair, Hyunjin means the two other people in the library besides Seungmin at that time of day. When he moves closer towards him, he realizes that Seungmin’s asleep, his head resting on top of a calc textbook. 

Hyunjin settles on the seat beside his friend, careful not to make any sound, then rests his cheek on the table so that they were face-to-face. Hyunjin watches as Seungmin breathes through his mouth, his lips slightly parting at the effort. His brows are furrowed, and Hyunjin fights back a scream at how adorable he is.

It is no doubt that Hyunjin’s favorite version of Seungmin is _the_ sleeping Seungmin, because it’s when he’s the nicest, the most peaceful, and not to mention, it’s the only moment where Hyunjin can stare at his face for as long as he wants without bearing the worry of getting caught. 

For a while, Hyunjin just stares at him, thoughtlessly, quietly, patiently. It isn’t until his sight lands on Seungmin’s smooth rosy cheek when he gets an idea. 

A crazy, impulsive idea. 

Before he knows it, he’s leaning in, closing the distance between their faces. Hyunjin stops just a breath away when Seungmin’s eyelids flutter, and the prickling feeling of hesitation starts to creep in his being. But before he can even totally change his mind, he bends down swiftly and plants a feather-light kiss on Seungmin’s cheek. 

Heart racing in his chest, Hyunjin watches in horror as Seungmin stirs awake. 

Shit, what if Seungmin had been awake all along? What if he wasn’t even too deep into his sleep that he somehow felt Hyunjin’s lips pressing against his cheek? 

Seungmin stares at Hyunjin for a moment, his eyes looking a little lost, then around them, as though he’s trying to figure out where he is. Hyunjin feels a fleeting second of relief, because this could mean that he _was_ actually sleeping, but only until Seungmin rubs at the exact same spot where Hyunjin just kissed him, and he feels a rush of internal panic. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“I dreamt of a dog." Seungmin frowns. "It licked my face.” 

_What_. Hyunjin bites back a scoff.

Really! It was a press on the cheek! Hyunjin barely even grazed his skin! 

Before Hyunjin can even say something stupid - something like defending _the dog_ in Seungmin’s dream, Seungmin speaks up. 

“How long have you been sitting there?” He asks as he stretches his arms on the table, the image briefly reminding Hyunjin of Kkami when he’s doing his cute little stretches in the morning.

Hyunjin shrugs. “A while.” 

“And how did you know I was here?” 

Hyunjin shrugs again. “I just knew, I guess.” Then he chuckles, earning them a pointed look from the student seated a few tables away from them. Seungmin looks over to the student in a blank expression, and suddenly, as though there’s a light flickering on in his head, his face morphs into a look which appeared to be something in between guilt and realization.

“Do you remember now?” Hyunjin raises an eyebrow mockingly. 

“What makes you think I forgot?” Seungmin retorts as he gathers the stash of books on the table and stuffs them in his backpack. 

“You forgot.” Hyunjin replies with a neutral tone, following after Seungmin when he stands up from his seat and heads out the library doors.

Seungmin yields right away. “I forgot.” 

“In that case, pizza’s on you tonight.” They make their way out the deserted hallway, walking side by side. Hyunjin makes sure he sticks to Seungmin as close as possible. 

“Hey, _Fur Fry_ is literally always held at my house.” Seungmin argues back. 

“That’s because the whole thing was your idea.”

“Exactly. And what had been your contribution?”

“Uhh.. I named it?” Hyunjin raises a brow. 

“Which we didn’t agree on.” 

“But you call it Fur Fry too!”

“Only because I’m left with no choice, Jinnie.” 

_Fur Fry_ is short for ‘First Friday’. It’s supposedly spelled as _fir-fri_ , derived from the suffixes of both words but their friends always mispronounces it as ‘fear free’, much to the frustration of the two. Fur Fry is basically just a sleepover at Seungmin's, comprising either a Star Wars or Gilmore Girls marathon, every first Friday of the month. Hyunjin couldn’t exactly grasp the hype for freaking Star Wars, but he’s not the one to complain when Seungmin gets completely lost in the movies and Hyunjin gets to lay on his lap, and the former would run his fingers through his hair absentmindedly for the entire duration of the movie. 

Gilmore Girls is Hyunjin's choice obviously, but he's not really obsessed with the series. He just really wants to know who Rory ends up with. Sometimes they watch kdramas, but their choices are so vast they almost always end up watching nothing and end up playing video games instead. And what's a sleepover without good food? They have only one rule: The greasier, the better. They’d order pizza, or make popcorn, or indulge themselves in cake and ice cream. Often times, when they’re feeling rebellious or rich or celebratory, it’s all of the above.

Like most first fridays, Hyunjin lays on Seungmin's lap tonight, feeling extra giddy because Seungmin immediately agreed when Hyunjin suggested Mulan. He wouldn’t admit it out loud, but Mulan’s probably his most favorite Disney movie ever. He kept bouncing on the couch when Seungmin put it on, and Hyunjin wondered why his friend was quietly laughing to himself the whole time.

Seungmin had just finished singing along to _'a girl worth fighting for'_ , Hyunjin chuckling at his voice mimicry, when Hyunjin suddenly grabs Seungmin’s hand to sling it over his torso. Hyunjin sets his own arm on top of Seungmin's, ignoring how his chest became so light and airy after the contact.

"Hyunjin?" Seungmin breaks the silence. Hyunjin turns his head to look up at him for a quick second, but the other boy fixes his gaze ahead on the tv screen. 

"What is it, Minnie?" Hyunjin replies as he slides his hand over Seungmin’s then starts to fiddle with his fingers. Without wasting another second, Seungmin says, 

“Changbin asked me out.” 

Hyunjin freezes. The silence that passed was only for a short moment, but for Hyunjin, it almost felt like an eternity.

“Changbin?” 

“The guy from camp.” Hyunjin looks up to see that Seungmin’s already staring down at him, his eyes bright and hopeful. 

Hyunjin feels a tug on the general area of his chest, but he chooses to ignore it. 

“Oh, yeah. Changbin.” Hyunjin has fully stopped playing with their fingers now, and has settled with intertwining his own over Seungmin’s. Seungmin didn’t seem to mind, so he holds on tight. When he looks up at Seungmin again, the boy’s still staring at him. It doesn’t look like he removed his gaze from him at all.

“Does that mean I can meet him now?” 

And because Seungmin beams so widely right after, Hyunjin completely forgets about the unsettling feeling that has slowly crept its way to his chest.

**IV.**

Hyunjin doesn’t worry until he sees Seungmin through the windshield, waiting in front of the cinema, cold and alone, on what is supposed to be his first date. 

"How did it go?" Hyunjin tries to keep his tone neutral when Seungmin opens the passenger door. 

He finds it impossible to figure out Seungmin's mood as he slides into the passenger seat with a stoic expression. Hyunjin searches for his eyes, but he seems to be avoiding his gaze. Seungmin shuts the car door before saying, "It went well." 

_'Well'_ can mean a hundred things. _'Well'_ can mean that the date was okay enough that both parties had mutually agreed for a second one. _'Well'_ can mean that the date didn’t turn out as bad as they thought it would be, yet uninteresting enough for them to keep seeing each other. 

_‘Well'_ can also be a whole lie. Maybe the date didn't actually go well, and that's why Seungmin hit Hyunjin up at past 11 in the evening and asked to pick him up at the cinema. 

Hyunjin sits there, waiting for him to say more, but he doesn’t. So Hyunjin turns the stereo up, and sets off towards Seungmin’s home. 

Seungmin is uncharacteristically quiet the whole ride, but it isn’t the sad kind of quiet, Hyunjin presumes. It’s the _worst_ kind of quiet, the one in which Seungmin seems to be having a lot in his mind at the moment. He didn’t say anything the entire time, so Hyunjin didn’t dare cross his boundaries.

“Minnie, we’re here.” Hyunjin gives a light tap on his shoulder, and the gesture was almost like a control button of some sort because Seungmin seems to have snapped out of his stupor and comes back to reality. He stares around them for a quick second, and when he seems to have confirmed that they have arrived at their destination, Seungmin fixes his gaze on the car stereo. 

“Let me just finish this song.” 

And just like that, Seungmin gets lost in his own world again, humming and nodding along to the song playing on the radio. Hyunjin tries not to fidget when he checks the time and realizes that it's almost midnight. He left the house in a rush when Seungmin called him earlier, thinking his friend was into some kind of trouble. If his mom finds out that he snuck the car out of their driveaway at ass o' clock in the evening, he'd be good as dead.

_“But as if to knock me down, reality came around...”_

It's almost involuntary - his heart racing in his chest when Seungmin's soft, melodic voice cuts through the air.

The only light in the vehicle comes from the stereo screen, casting a pale blue reflection on Seungmin's face. Hyunjin doesn’t know if he’s just masking it so well, but he doesn’t look the least bit sad, troubled, or upset. Or joyous, excited, giddy - really any possible emotion that one could have after a first date. Seungmin is just indifferent, and Hyunjin’s a bit frustrated that he can’t read him. 

_“I truly am indeed, alone again, naturally.”_

With that line, Hyunjin starts to feel a sudden surge of anxiety, stopping himself before he could do something impulsive like turn off the radio or reach out for Seungmin’s hand. 

“Hey, don’t take it too seriously. It’s just a song.” He says instead, the concern obvious in his tone. Finally, Seungmin’s lips stretches out into a small smile, and Hyunjin feels so relieved it’s like some weight has been lifted off his chest.

"I just like the song, is all." 

“Oh.” 

Seungmin presses his lips into a thin line, then releases a sigh. “Thanks for picking me up.”

“No problem.” 

Seungmin rests his hand on the door handle, and Hyunjin thinks he’s finally stepping out of the car, but he doesn’t make a move to open the door. Instead, he leans back again and groans when the next song comes on the radio. 

“It’s Fall Out Boy!” 

Hyunjin chuckles, feeling his chest warm up for some reason. "We should let this one finish as well.” 

Seungmin sends him a grateful look, and Hyunjin gets a fleeting thought that Seungmin might just be using the radio as an excuse to not step out of the car just yet. 

Hyunjin finds out later that the first date did go well enough for them to try for a second, but after that, he never hears about Changbin again.

**V.**

The first time Hyunjin sees Seungmin wearing a tux wasn’t in a store trying out variations for his cousin. It was, no other than, the night during Senior Prom, where things turned out to be more memorable than what Hyunjin had expected. 

His prom date, a girl from his History class named Chaeyoung, downright tells him that she doesn’t want to dance as they walk inside the venue. And Hyunjin, who has a burning passion for dancing, feels like he was being insulted right in the face. But because he doesn’t want to disappoint Chaeyoung in any way, he stuck by her side and tried to be a good prom date despite his feet itching to join his friends on the dance floor. 

The two stayed at one corner, where for almost the entire night, they remain talking and laughing about things that happened in their History class (which wasn’t much because _it’s History class_ for fuck’s sake), all the while complaining about the over-sweetened fruit punch, though both of them finishes three glasses each. 

Once in a while, Hyunjin glances over Chaeyoung’s shoulder towards the sea of people. He catches Minho killing some dance moves in the middle of the dance floor, he spots Chan and Woojin whispering in each other’s ears at the opposite corner, he sees a lot of things, but Hyunjin’s eyes still wanders around, looking only for one person. 

He doesn't spot Seungmin until later that night, when the band switches to playing alternative rock songs and the dance floor transitions quickly into a mini pit like the one you see in concerts.

Hyunjin remembers clearly that it was during _Mr. Brightside_ when he finds Seungmin’s face in the middle of the makeshift pit, carefully making his way through the swarming bodies. 

He watches as Seungmin pushes through the crowd, closing the distance between them. Seungmin doesn’t seem to have spotted Hyunjin from his little corner yet. Beside him, Hyunjin can hear Chaeyoung tell him about this strawberry milkshake recipe she came up with herself, and somewhere along the conversation, Hyunjin gets lost, because Seungmin is getting closer, and the closer he gets, the better he sees, and Hyunjin just can't seem to take his eyes off of him. 

Seungmin is a few paces away when he's suddenly stopped by Jisung on his tracks, introducing him to the raven-haired girl with a shy smile beside him. Hyunjin has tried to redirect his full attention to his conversation with Chaeyoung, but it wasn't easy, not when Seungmin starts to smile when he greets Jisung's date, and Hyunjin just about melts right there.

And there's this Mr. Brightside song which Hyunjin wholeheartedly hates because he’s reminded of that time when his neighbor blasted this song at an ungodly hour for six consecutive days. 

Hyunjin is still watching them when Jisung leaves with his date, finally leaving Seungmin all alone. Then suddenly, the grin on Seungmin’s face shines even more brightly, and when Hyunjin begins to wonder why, he realizes that Seungmin is staring right at him. 

And because his mind has short-circuited due to Seungmin’s smile, the first thing Hyunjin tells him is this: 

“I hate this song.” 

Seungmin rolls his eyes, but lets out a hearty laugh in spite of himself. “Will you forget about your crazy neighbor already and hear this masterpiece for what it really is.” 

“I can’t. I can hear him through this song every time.” 

Hyunjin turns towards Chaeyoung’s direction when he gets the idea of introducing them to each other, but the spot beside him is now empty. 

“Uh, I think my date just ditched me.” _Or I ditched her._

Seungmin shrugs. “I can’t really blame her.” 

Hyunjin punches him on the arm lightly, and Seungmin’s laughter rings through the air. Suddenly, there’s a shrill of excited screaming coming from the crowd as the band moves on to disco pop, and Hyunjin couldn’t help but perk up when he recognizes the melody. 

“Ooh, it’s the September song!” 

Seungmin says something over the music but Hyunjin didn’t catch any of his words. 

“What?” 

Seungmin leans closer, then says more loudly, “Would you like to dance?” 

Hyunjin was just going to vocally accept the offer, but from that proximity, he gets a proper view of Seungmin’s sparkly eyes, promptly cueing the fluttering of the butterflies in his belly. 

“You have glitters in your eyes.” He says dazedly, a little bit starstruck at the realization. 

Seungmin makes no comment on Hyunjin’s observation, but his smile brightens nonetheless. Then he reaches out for Hyunjin’s hand, pulling him towards the dance floor. Instantly, Hyunjin starts moving with the rhythm, creating fluid movements with his hips and his arms. He doubles over when Seungmin attempts to imitate his dance moves, executing them all while holding a serious face and continuing with such confidence as if he was doing it all right. (He wasn’t.) 

Hyunjin thinks he laughed more than he danced that night, while Seungmin danced more than he ever did in his entire life. Hyunjin got to have a few more looks on Seungmin’s pretty eyes, but the one time he truly couldn’t forget was when the mood changes around the room once again - the music switches to the slow-paced songs, and the disco light has stopped flashing multiple colors and settles to a pale white light. 

For an awkward moment, they both just stood there unsure of what to do, until Hyunjin was pushed closer towards Seungmin. _Literally_ . He gets shoved from behind, and he stumbles quite embarrassingly in front of his friend, who only helps him get back on his feet, chuckling, his arms then slowly, _smoothly_ , raking around Hyunjin’s back. His mind blanks when Seungmin takes his other hand then steadily leads them into a dance. Hyunjin didn’t have any thoughts, his mind was sort of just floating. _He_ felt like he was floating, especially when Seungmin stares at him so endearingly, the stars in his eyes shining the brightest Hyunjin has ever seen them before. 

**VI.**

“So, I’m just thinking,” Hyunjin starts with his eyes glued to the screen, his mouth gaping as Summer leans in to kiss Tom inside the copy room, their hands snaking around each other as they deepen their kiss. The scene makes Hyunjin a little hot, he’s not even gonna lie, and that’s probably where he got the courage to ask the following question. 

“What happens if we kiss right now?”

Hyunjin regrets the question as soon as it leaves his mouth. He hears Seungmin munch on his popcorn, creating a rather loud crunching sound that makes Hyunjin anxious with every passing second. He thinks Seungmin isn’t ever going to answer him, which is understandable. It is after all, a very silly question, especially between two best friends who haven’t touched any kind of these topics before. 

Just when Hyunjin thinks about making an excuse to regard the question as a joke, Seungmin speaks up, and he realizes that Seungmin just waited for the makeout scene to finish before replying,

“We’ll probably miss a minute of the movie.”

A minute. One whole minute of kissing Seungmin.

Hyunjin gulps. The thought of it makes his stomach lurch for some reason, but in a good way. 

“And the rest of the world will probably still go on turning.” Seungmin adds randomly and proceeds to shove another handful of popcorn into his mouth, nonchalant and unbothered, eyes still glued on the screen.

“Or it could end.” Hyunjin counters absentmindedly, always the one to say random gibberish stuff. Seungmin finally averts his gaze away from the tv to throw the other boy a look. 

“Why the hell would it end?”

Hyunjin can properly see Seungmin's lips now - disgustingly glossy with the treat he's eating with the bits of popcorn all over his mouth. He can already see it happening - Seungmin's lips on his - moving, grazing, nibbling at his own. How it must feel to have his full pouty lips brush against his. And maybe, just maybe -

“So you wanna do it?” Seungmin stares right into his eyes, asking the question in the calmest tone that sends Hyunjin’s mind reeling. 

He’s not sure if Seungmin's simply playing along or if it's some kind of rhetorical question that Hyunjin should be taking seriously. 

Before he can even gather his bearings, Seungmin inches towards him, closing the gap between them on the couch. Without further hesitation, without giving Hyunjin the time to process what he's doing, Seungmin leans his head closer towards Hyunjin's, stopping right where the tip of their noses touch.

“You know, to find out if the world would end if we do?” Seungmin's warm caramel popcorn breath tickles Hyunjin's mouth, and the urge to just lean in and kiss his face is driving Hyunjin mad.

Hyunjin doesn’t know what to say, or what to do next. Of course, he has the option of leaning away, which is what a rational person would do, _which is what Hyunjin knows he's supposed to do._ But he doesn't - he couldn't - not when there's this other option of leaning in, and kissing Seungmin right then and there. And Hyunjin would be a liar if he says he’s not considering the second option at all.

But like the coward that he is, Hyunjin does neither, and only basks in the feeling of Seungmin's proximity.

And then Seungmin does it.

Seungmin tilts his head a little bit and brushes his lips against Hyunjin's, teasing the latter with a graze. Seungmin slowly wraps his arms around Hyunjin's neck, pulling him closer, and finally fully catches Hyunjin's lips in his. Hyunjin grabs unto Seungmin's waist as they deepen the kiss, his heart beating in his chest a hundred miles per hour. He falls into a state of nirvana. 

It feels _surreal_ \- Seungmin kissing him. Hyunjin kissing Seungmin, his best friend. 

Best friend.

The label makes Hyunjin's heart drop: _best friend_. 

And then all at once, Hyunjin's mind starts being an ass again, sprouting the same little doubts and questions that Hyunjin has been trying to deal with for _years_. 

Hyunjin feels compelled to break away from the kiss, feeling like he's about to go crazy with all the thoughts and emotions overwhelming him. They slowly part away, both slightly panting, and Hyunjin tries to look anywhere but Seungmin’s eyes. He fears about what might happen next. Funny how it was his exact question on the first place.

Okay, so they kissed. The world didn't end. But something's about to _._ It's going to end before it could all even begin, and for that to happen, all Hyunjin has to do is to say it. 

"Jinnie, are you okay?" Seungmin's gentle voice breaks the silence, and Hyunjin gets even more nervous at the sound of concern in his tone. 

"Yeah. I'm okay." Hyunjin is still refusing to look at him, so he doesn't see it when Seungmin reaches out to cup his face with his hands, making him turn to face him. 

Hyunjin feels his breath hitch when Seungmin suddenly leans closer. He thinks Seungmin is gonna kiss him again, but the latter only presses their foreheads together, holding on to Hyunjin's nape when the latter tries to back away.

Hyunjin doesn’t know where he got the courage, but he managed to speak up first, despite his voice shaking due to nerves. 

“Minnie.”

It must have been the heat of the moment. It must have been hormones. It must have been the fact that Hyunjin doesn't have enough strength to keep his feelings to himself any longer. He has been bearing the weight of his feelings for _months_ , years even, and he's sure if he doesn't let them out soon, if he doesn't tell Seungmin about them soon, he's going to explode.

“Hmm?” 

Hyunjin has never been good with words. Hyunjin is a man of action, everyone knows that. When he's sad, he'll cry for a good couple of hours until he feels better again. When someone makes him angry, they'd see it in his face before he takes a swing at them. He gives hugs, tackles, and holds his friends’ hands because it’s his way of showing affection. He has never been good with words, but this time, he takes the leap.

“I think I like you.” He whispers. He didn't like how the words and his shaky voice strung together to make it sound like he’s uncertain, so Hyunjin tries again, “I _know_ I like you. A lot.” 

To his horror, Seungmin suddenly pulls away, and Hyunjin misses his warmth almost immediately. He shuts his eyes because he doesn't think he can bear to look at Seungmin at the moment.

They just kissed! And Hyunjin confessed right after! And Seungmin's going to reject him! Oh lord, this is bad. 

Seungmin doesn't say anything, and Hyunjin presumes he's trying to take everything slowly (or trying to think of kinder words to reject Hyunjin's confession) so he waits in bated breath. 

Hyunjin has never been good with words, and he wonders right then if his confession had been enough. Does he have to explain why he likes Seungmin? Does he have to say when he started to like him? Wait, what if he doesn't even remember that? What else do you say in confessions? Ah, this shit is confusing.

He still has his eyes closed, and Seungmin still hasn't said anything yet. He couldn't wait any longer. With another brave move, Hyunjin finally opens his eyes. 

And wow. 

The smile on Seungmin’s face is blinding, and he is staring so fondly at Hyunjin that he can feel his heart swell. 

Seungmin makes a move to take Hyunjin's hand, intertwining his fingers around his. Hyunjin finds the smile on Seungmin's face extremely contagious and it is, for the lack of better words, the most beautiful thing Hyunjin has ever seen. 

Between the two of them, Seungmin's the one who's great with words. Articulate, blunt, coherent. But at that moment, he didn't use words to speak to Hyunjin. 

Seungmin squeezes his hand, and Hyunjin immediately understands.

  
  


Double periods are suffocating. The professor has been droning on about scalars and vectors for almost an hour now, and when he starts writing on the board and sketches a little table and fills the columns and rows with integers in it, Hyunjin just about lost it. He might as well bang his head on his desk. 

He checks the time (again), and internally groans when he realizes that there's still a little over an hour left to suffer in that four-walled dreadful room. Hyunjin _hates_ waiting. His dad has always been telling him off with his impatience, telling him that life, in whatever aspect, would sometimes require a bit more time, and that being patient can almost always end up being truly rewarding. Like how that saying goes, _good things come to those who wait._ Suddenly reminded of all the long-suffering times he has waited for some things, he grabs his pen and jots down the string of words that has formed in his head.

And because the class is boring and Hyunjin has just enough sappy bones in his body, he pulls out his phone and types the words in his messenger.

_I think half of my time is wasted in waiting - Waiting in queue, waiting for departure, waiting for this class to be over, waiting for you._

And because Hyunjin starts missing Seungmin for no valid reason, he adds a heart emoji at the end of the message, then he hits send. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! happy holidays! <3


End file.
